updates!
SATURDAY; 101107
woke up finding th hse empty,
and therefore decided to slp a lil longer.
arnd 1215, left home for cg at mason place.
cg started off wit a short prayer meeting.
we prayed for jared, we prayed for th arise and build.
overall, cg meeting was still alright.
after that, went punggol cc to play badminton,
and left arnd 5plus6.
SUNDAY; 111107
dad don't allow me to attend service,
and that i was pretty upset.
in th afternoon went to queensway to buy my shoe,
and finally gotten a pair of adidas original!!
thanks mum!! (: returned home, finding not a meaning to do anythng.
slept thru late afternoon till night,
waking up feeling hungry.
thr wasn't any food, and no one was at home.
switched on th television, watched fantastic4,
and finally mum and aunt returned home.
continued watching th noose, and it was damn funny. (:
used th com till abt 11plus,
and decided it was tym to slp, and then i walked into my room.
lying on th bed; i just couldn't fall aslp.
thoughts of th past week came into mind,
and questions i asked God, why was it unfair to me?
why me? why me? why me?
i just don't get it. why i got treated in a manner,
a total opposite from what i've given in.
i just don't get it, and i continued to question.
tears of doubt, tears of fear, tears of guiltiness just flowed.
i couldn't stop, flashbacks appears.
then i thought of why didn't i have th courage to pray during cg on saturday.
i knew i had lots to say, i knew i had lots to pray for.
but it's th fear thats inside me stopping me from doing so.
then i started to question God again.
" why Lord, why didn't you give th courage? i knew i needed to pray,
but i just didn't dare to."
as i continue tearing, i prayed even harder.
i needed a breakthrough, that will bring my spiritual life to a higher level.
and once again, th tiny voice inside spoke:
" 72hours. this lil sacrifice will in turn make u realise that God is real.
and God loves you no matter wat happens. you just have to rmb,
your world does not framed arnd what ppl say but by th words of th holy.
behold, God do not send you out to this world for nothing.
but for somethng so special. patience. "
somehow, these words stop my tears from flowing.
i could not slp th entire night,
SATURDAY; 101107
woke up finding th hse empty,
and therefore decided to slp a lil longer.
arnd 1215, left home for cg at mason place.
cg started off wit a short prayer meeting.
we prayed for jared, we prayed for th arise and build.
overall, cg meeting was still alright.
after that, went punggol cc to play badminton,
and left arnd 5plus6.
SUNDAY; 111107
dad don't allow me to attend service,
and that i was pretty upset.
in th afternoon went to queensway to buy my shoe,
and finally gotten a pair of adidas original!!
thanks mum!! (: returned home, finding not a meaning to do anythng.
slept thru late afternoon till night,
waking up feeling hungry.
thr wasn't any food, and no one was at home.
switched on th television, watched fantastic4,
and finally mum and aunt returned home.
continued watching th noose, and it was damn funny. (:
used th com till abt 11plus,
and decided it was tym to slp, and then i walked into my room.
lying on th bed; i just couldn't fall aslp.
thoughts of th past week came into mind,
and questions i asked God, why was it unfair to me?
why me? why me? why me?
i just don't get it. why i got treated in a manner,
a total opposite from what i've given in.
i just don't get it, and i continued to question.
tears of doubt, tears of fear, tears of guiltiness just flowed.
i couldn't stop, flashbacks appears.
then i thought of why didn't i have th courage to pray during cg on saturday.
i knew i had lots to say, i knew i had lots to pray for.
but it's th fear thats inside me stopping me from doing so.
then i started to question God again.
" why Lord, why didn't you give th courage? i knew i needed to pray,
but i just didn't dare to."
as i continue tearing, i prayed even harder.
i needed a breakthrough, that will bring my spiritual life to a higher level.
and once again, th tiny voice inside spoke:
" 72hours. this lil sacrifice will in turn make u realise that God is real.
and God loves you no matter wat happens. you just have to rmb,
your world does not framed arnd what ppl say but by th words of th holy.
behold, God do not send you out to this world for nothing.
but for somethng so special. patience. "
somehow, these words stop my tears from flowing.
i could not slp th entire night,
thoughts just kept coming back.
fasting. praying.
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