but, i'm really tired. and i'm sick of being tired alrdy. i think thr's something seriously wrong wit me. it's either i'm really changing dratically or things arnd me are changing and i can't keep up wit tym. i can't exactly say i'm numbed by th pain, th heartaches and whatsoever. cos every now and then, i feel th hole in chest churning so bad, tht sometyms i literally scream th pain off in my pillow then drift off to slp. thts why, somehow i'm really thankful for th sunburnt, cos i can feel th pain off my skin. and tht's lyk one of th few tyms i can express th pain so openly. i want to run away, away to a foreign land. whereby thr's no emotions, no friends. somewhr near th beach, hearing th waves makes me feel calm. but well, when reality hits - there's no turning back.